Wednesday, January 20, 2016

Chapter Thirteen.

     What a fucking month. Three of my musical heroes are in the ground. I'm working my ass off and still can't see how I'm going to make it to February. I've had the hoodie on for most of the last ten days. With the hood up. In the house. (If you don't understand that reference, jump to HERE. It'll make a lot more sense.) I started a Go Fund Me account to see if people actually like my writing enough to financially contribute to it, and got nothing. (Not true. My girlfriend made the one and only contribution, which technically does count, but also might not count, since I sleep with her. Which does not make me a gigolo, because she contributed financially to my writing - not my penis.)

     The vindictive little boy in me just wants to shut the whole fucking thing down. Take my unappreciated marbles and go home. Except I can't. As bad as shit gets, as underwhelming as response may be, I made a decision to put my words in this space. Keeping my promises has never been my greatest ability. Truth to tell, I have a pretty poor history of that.  So I desperately need at least one instance in my life where I stick to my guns, and this is that.

     And so here is the next chapter of my memoir, Making Sh*t Up: An Improvised Life. Promise. Fucking. Kept.

     Chapter Thirteen

   Spear Hunting on a Budget

In my head, it was totally going to be like this. 

   
 When you’re poor, you do things as a family that other families don’t do. One Sunday my dad was up earlier than usual, doing something very industrious-sounding on the carport. I walked out there to see him sawing an old broomstick in half. Next he made a notch in one end of each of the halves. He then took a long steel nail, and placed it head-side into the notch, leaving the pointed end of the nail exposed. The finished product looked just like a short spear, which I thought was very cool. Holy shit. Was Dad about to take me hunting WITH SPEARS?  Turns out the answer was yes, but not the kind of hunting I’d envisioned.
     Dad piled us all into the Impala, including my mom and little sister (she couldn’t have been more than six, making me around ten), so I knew right away this wasn’t going to be any kind of father/son spear-hunting expedition. We drove out of our neighborhood at Artesian Lakes (the neighborhood with the lake that wasn’t really a lake), and onto FM 2854, also called Old Montgomery Road, a long stretch of two-lane blacktop that connected Conroe to Montgomery, Texas. We’d been driving down this road for about ten minutes when Dad slowed the car, and pulled off onto the shoulder. He ordered everybody out, and that’s when he announced what our family outing was going to be: a treasure hunt for old bottles and cans by the side of the road.
     Dad explained that there was a place we could take bottles and cans to that would give us money in return for them. And that people were always throwing their empty soda and beer cans out of their car windows, so finding them on a much-used stretch of road like this would be easy. Then he opened the trunk and withdrew one of his newly built spears. He looked around for a moment, located an old Dr. Pepper can, and neatly speared it, placing it in a heavy-duty garbage bag he’d tied on to his belt loop. He gave each of us a garbage bag, then pulled the other spear out of the trunk – and handed it to Mom. When I asked where my spear was (I didn’t ask about my sister’s; she was just a kid), Dad informed me that Larenda and I didn’t need spears, as we were much closer to the ground. When I asked him if he at least brought gloves for us to wear, he began to look cross. So I shut up and started looking for bottles and cans.
     Time moves maddeningly slow for children, particularly when they are engaged in an activity they’d really rather not be doing. I tried to make some shit up in my head; I was a treasure hunter. I was the last man on Earth, looking for anything I could use to survive. I was Iron Eyes Cody, the Native American from those “Keep America Beautiful” ads, who had finally stopped crying, got down off his horse, and started cleaning up the country. But I kept getting pulled out of my imagination by the cars that were flying past us on this farm-to-market road. They seemed awfully close, and they seemed to be going awfully fast. I kept looking for Larenda, hoping my baby sister wasn’t straying too close to the road. Mom and Dad were engrossed in the task, and Dad seemed to get angrier as the day wore on. And wear it did.
     A couple of memories stick out from that day. I remember spotting a Miller Lite beer can. I scooped it up, except I grabbed it upside-down, and realized too late that it was still half-full. Rancid beer came pouring out of the mouth of the can and on to my jeans, and it smelled like the devil’s own piss. (It might also be why I do not drink Lite beer to this day.)
     Later in the afternoon, when all four of us were covered in dirt, grime, and the remnants of many bottles and cans, a car slowed near us, pulled over and stopped. The man behind the wheel I recognized as one of the deacons at Mount Calvary Baptist Church. I didn’t know what a deacon was, but I did know that I didn’t like this man very much, because he always seemed to be smiling in a way that suggested he was better than you.  I was close enough to hear part of their exchange.
     Him: “Hello, John. We missed y’all in service this morning. What’re you and your family doin’ out by the side of the road on a day like today?”
     Dad (chagrined): “Just, uh, you know…collecting some bottles and cans for recycling.”
     Him: “Is that right? Well…bless your heart.” And he was smiling that smile, which nowadays I would classify as a shit-eating grin. They exchanged a couple more words and the man drove off, and I could see Dad seething with a barely controlled rage. I was old enough to understand that he was mortally embarrassed. I was also old enough to know that we would be the likely targets of his anger.
     Just at that moment, from what seemed like very far away, we heard a scream. Dad and I both looked back the way we had come to see my little sister, maybe fifty yards away, jumping around and dancing like she had ants in her pants. Which, in fact, she did. Larenda, in her earnest efforts to please, had been dutifully picking up roadside garbage all day. Like the rest of us, she was filthy, sunburned, and tired. But she had evidently found a treasure: a shiny new Coke can that was partially buried in a mound of dirt. She was too young to identify the mound for what it actually was: a fire ant hill. When she successfully pried the can loose from the ground, the little fuckers attacked en masse. Mom reached her first, and as Dad and I arrived Mom was literally stripping my sister down to her underwear on the side of the road.
     Add to this indignity the fact that we had been walking away from the car all day in our search for “treasure.” Dad had, once or twice, gone back to the Impala and driven it along the shoulder to where we were. But at some point he had stopped bringing the car up to us. While Mom was slapping fire ants off my little sister’s skin, I looked back over my shoulder – and realized I couldn’t even see the car. There was no way Larenda could walk that far, so Dad – utterly raging silent by this time – started the trek back to the Impala. I have no idea how long it took him to retrieve the car and pick us up, but it seemed a very long time. And all that time cars were passing us on the road, and slowing, and staring at two dirty little kids, and their dirty mom. And the littlest kid was wailing like a banshee, and the oldest kid was zealously guarding four giant bags of trash – our treasure from a Sunday Family Outing.

     Next Week, Chapter Fourteen: Cancer, Leprosy, Honesty, Sympathy, and Skipping School.

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